Scrooge and the Good in the Holidays

The holidays are here. Yeah. But they are tempered by some scrooge visits already happening. So here are my nominations, my opinions, for Scrooge of the Year:

The entire Republican Party: they know nothing about compromise and constituents and pay more attention to PAC funds from Managed Care Insurers then the health and well being of their constituents.

Senator Lieberman: who cares more about getting his name in the press then about health care or common sense issues.

President Obama: this one pains me greatly as I supported him and believed in him; and to an extent, I still do. But he did not step up to health care and is happy about a bill that will take 4 years to implement (unneccessarily) while impacting the over 160,000 people who will die over those years. Keep it simple and make it happen should be the mantra here.

My former employer which also pains me greatly. While this company does good things for people who reside in their communities, public documents filed in their recent bankruptcy show they made sure to financially stuff the pockets of the chosen few executives just 4 days prior to the filing while not paying the accrued time off earned by employees who agreed to stay to the end as part of a signed agreement with those people. These are people like you and me; good workers with families who got no money; no payment for time earned and not used which is a policy of this company, no severance and are struggling to live and provide for their children. Chances are these individuals will become part of the uninsured, the foreclosed and more. While executives were enriched. I wonder how the leaders can sleep at night, especially this holiday season.

The good: the kindness of strangers, friends and family to help each other in good times and bad. I wish for these people the best life has to offer. I wish for peace and joy and justice in 2010 and I want to especially acknowledge the employees of Social Security who are kind and never recognized. They helped me to get Medicare health coverage for 2010 so I would not be one of the uninsured. Thank YOU!

So Happy Holidays to all and to all, thoughts and prayers for a healthy and happy 2010!

Rain, rain go away

It's been raining here in Baltimore for what seems teh entire week. But I think the sun is up this morning. Yeah! Today my PTO (vacation time) paycheck is supposed to arrive. Hurray! Next week severance checks, all 3 of them start. Hurray! Today seems like Saturday to me but then what do I know. Not working, not paying attention to days.

But am getting my hair cut today and paying bills....a true cleansing of the mind. Yesterday was tough as I got a letter from Social Security saying I have to pay $180.00 for Medicare A and B monthly. What? Medicare hardly covers anything. Usually its $96.40 a month but they got my last year's taxes and say I made too much. Excuse me, that was last year. I am unemployed people. I went to the office in my area and got it fixed sort of. I just refused it and delaying part B. Part B covers doctors visits. I have COBRA (I think still have not gotten anything in the mail yet). I am amazed by how people who are supposed to help you through these times, just don't seem to care. Not the Social Security people, they are just doing their jobs and are always very pleasant. But the administrator of our health plan and COBRA are really short tempered and unpleasant to deal with.

I think I will make them trees.....I had this thing that if someone is nasty, I should not be fueled by their stupidness and behavior. I should not expend energy on them. So I make them a tree...oak, maple, whatever. Then they are part of the enviroment but not up to me to care for them...its up to the powers above. But, in the initial bad time when I make them a tree, just before I let go of them, I envision a dog urinating on them. I laugh, and they are gone from my mind.

And so it goes, the list of trees gets longer, but I let go more easily. And the sun will be out!
Have a great day and great Mom's day everyone! More to come.........................

Reality is setting in....getting laid off, new start

Here's what strikes me as I head into the end of the first week of being laid off: there aren't as many emails or anything work related to do. Too damn quiet. Except, that is, for my 2 grandchildren. I am staying at my daughter's since she just delivered a new baby girl, a real sweetie. And, her big sister, 2 plus yrs old and a complete singer, dancer and actress. She is a real comedienne. They, and my children, fill the days with complete joy. But I have certain things I must take care of.....all work or unemployment related.

So all toll I have 9 weeks of severance and accrued vacation to come. Have not started looking for work yet, will leave that for next week. Now, its about looking at expenses and starting to think about the future.

Today, I switched my phone and Internet to Comcast, the triple deal special though I already have them for my cable provider. Fios is in my area and is really giving Comcast a run for their money. I used that in my negotiation with Comcast. I asked them what they were going to do to keep me as a customer and it worked. They beat Fios. Best part: I am saving $70 per month for the first 6 months and $50 per month thereafter. Just basic cable, no frills. But I love my cable shows: HGTV, Food Network, Project Runway is coming back on Lifetime...gotta have my cable.

But for those of us in the unemployment with no choice mode, rule number 1 should be negotiate to get the best deals and look at what you absolutely must have/keep. It's a buyer's market and no one should be afraid to try to get the best deal possible.

Before LO (layoff), I had already made changes in the house to cut costs: energy efficient windows, those funny looking light bulbs, unplugging everything that is not in use as energy is still drained even if you don't use an appliance and am happy to report that I have saved over $100 per month!

But I also have to think about income. So I called social security and surprise of surprises, they were wonderful! They were easy to talk to, helpful and fast. Who knew??? What I learned was a little disappointing. I am not really of retirement age (66 for women) though I turn 65 at the end of May. Therefore, I can collect social security with restrictions on income. I will only be able to earn $1000 per month. How do they expect people to live on that? They do it to defer the age people will sign up for these benefits. I signed up anyway because I can suspend my benefits at anytime. I wonder if winning the mega millions counts? No, I have not won but did buy a ticket for tonight.

COBRA: its not bad. That is if you are not turning 65. If you are 65 and have no health insurance through work and do not get Medicare, you are penalized when you do sign up for Medicare. COBRA is not considered health insurance through work so even though it would cost me less to do COBRA then Medicare plus a Medi-Gap program, if I don't sign up for Medicare now, the penalty is hefty when I do sign up. So I signed up. But I can use COBRA till my Medicare kicks in. My health insurance is paid till the end of April so guess what I did? I made all my medical appointments for next week. HA! At least I can get everything I need done before any other insurance kicks in. Not all doctors accept Medicare for payment. My own doctor does not. Not fun. More on this in upcoming blog.

Not seeing the people you worked with is really tough. Today I had lunch with 2 dear friends I made at work and that really lifted my spirits.

I find myself going through periods of sadness and anger. And as one who had the "personification of procrastination" written under her name in the college yearbook, I always looked for ways to put off what I didn't care to do, until tomorrow (ah, Scarlett O'Hara). Since the LO, I struggle to deal with the issues at hand even more so. Particularly the job market and income. I know the job market is not good; and at my age, its a disaster. That's when the anger sets in. A 401K that sucks and the thought that I would work for 3 more years at the company that set me free is almost too much to think about.

And, I think about me and how I really never felt quite comfortable that I would make it to retirement at this company. You know, I actually had 2 cell phones: 1 was the company cell and 1 was my personal cell. I never merged them. Interesting huh? I guess rule number two is listen to your gut. Your instincts are always better guides to what you should or should not do.

My former company did provide outplacement service and next Thursday and Friday I will be there. That's a good service to have where they look at your resume and help you update it; work on cover letters, review the job market and interviewing. I am looking forward to it and will be happy to share what I learn here. Hopefully, I will find some motivation there also since that is what is missing the most right now.

I guess this blog is not the most optimistic, tempered or not but it will get better....it will...maybe tomorrow.

The first blog...starting over

Today, with the help of my online friend, Ronni Bennett of Time Goes By, I begin a new blogging life. On income tax day I was laid off of work, one of 100 good people who tried their best to help a company be the best it could be. Unfortunately, none of us could predict what the last 8 years of the Bush administration would create: a horrific economy. Many companies, such as the one I worked for, were forced to lay off good people. And, if the truth be told, I knew it was coming.

Last December/January, there was a restructuring of the organization advertising department. I never really considered myself an advertiser but a marketer, a strategic thinker and doer, and communications. I was no longer leading an exceptional team of professionals. Instead I was to report to the head of brand management. Part of me was very excited at the prospect of doing what I was hired to do initially. Part of me knew this was the beginning of the end. How did I know? Easy, I worked in health care marketing, an aspect not easily accepted or understood by most. For years our team struggled with gaining internal acceptance of what our health programs were or did to promote the lifestyle of active, independent older adults. Perhaps it was my failure. Perhaps it was others' inability to see health as something more then doctors, or any medical intervention. Whatever the issue, the point was from this point on, I felt as though I could not make an impact on what I believed was the single most important factor that differentiated this company from other wanna be companies.


This was the 3rd layoff of 2009 for this organization. This one was quieter, though the rumors were alive and well. As I reflect now, I wonder what the leadership was thinking? surely they must have known employees heard the rumblings. Then it came. I got called to come in since I was to be at a conference. Though I had expected this, when I got the call, I really was stunned. I made it easy for my boss and others. After all the bottom line is that the company has to do what needs to be done to survive in this economy as it serves many lives and does a damn good job of serving others. I will pray for them and my coworkers.

What I miss the most is the people with whom I worked. I know each of us has our own lives and keeping in touch will be difficult for some. For me, I begin a new at an interesting point in my life. I had thought I would retire in at least 3 years so I could get the maximum benefit from Social Security since my 401K is so down from what it was. But I got a small severance and some accrued vacation time. And there is always unemployment! Though it will be difficult, I have decided to take some time for me and think things over. You know the old saying: I don't know what I want to be when I grow up? I think this is true at any age. Maybe there is a pot of gold at the end of this rainbow.



Over the next few blogs, I will write of my experiences, my plan, and my outlook. I title the blog the tempered optimist because that is who I am. I like to think that I look at things from the best side, not the worst; yet I am tempered by life's experiences so that I do not always see only the rosy side of life. I choose to be realistic but with a positive twist. Does that make sense? Who knows? But this is the start of a new journey. I hope you will contribute thoughts, suggestions, and opinions along the way.