One of the nice things the company I used to work for did was to allow those of us provided work cell phones with Blackberry components, was to keep them though we had to transfer them to personal use. I did. I love my little phone/blackberry whatever. However, I just realized that when you don't work, you don't get as many emails. And, I was addicted to my email.
I am a Type A personality: always doing, going, finding things to do, people to meet, places to go. The quiet (if you can call staying at your daughters with a baby and a 2 year old quiet) is getting to me. I cannot find a place to call me own and feel very, very....I don't know what I feel to be honest.
I wear no make up and sometimes scare myself when I see myself in the mirror. Who is this person? Not me, that's for sure.
Trying to deal and sort out all the issues related to unemployment sucks. I feel my motivation for doing things has left me. I need to get myself together. Next week I go back home and hope to start exercising again to push me to the point where I can take care of me.
Today it's supposed to be in the 80's. I am going to visit my son in Hanover Pa and looking forward to it. Other then this, not sure what I will do. But maybe I expect too much of myself now. Maybe I need to just chill out and stop over thinking things. Should I be defined by my work side? Gosh I hope not. I am hope I am more then a marketing, communications, branding, health care former nurse person.
I am a mother, grandmother, daughter, sister, friend, and??? Not sure what the question marks mean. But maybe they mean everything happens for a reason and maybe this is the time to reflect on me to find out who I am and what I want to be......I do know I want to have fun again. So I have to strive for that....more to come.
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I just found your new site by way of Ronni at Time Goes By. I am looking forward to reading your blogs. I have been unemployed for about 18 months and your comments strike some chords with me.
ReplyDeleteWelcome! I'm from Time Goes By, too, and you have a great blogging voice. Keep posting, even if it's just a paragraph a day.
ReplyDeleteI also had some big, unwanted life changes that have lasted much longer than I ever could have imagined. So of course I have "advice" but plenty of time for that later.
In the meantime, do have fun. Life is short, and it's a lot more than a job.
I found you through Ronni too, and so glad I did. I'm looking forward to your continued posts. While I'm retired, not unemployed, I well remember the pain of the identify shift when I left a job that had been important to me and realized had I let go of who I thought I was and began to enjoy what else I could be as I grew up. Still growing.....
ReplyDeleteHello, I too found your site through Time Goes By. I am delighted to have found you here! It is funny, I am still working - and find that I almost envy my sister and my friends that have been laid off. Not the struggling with money part of it all, but the opportunity to spend several weeks enjoying family, the ability to spontaneously visit grandkids, the chance to lay in bed until noon. And then, the interesting challenges with finding the larger "self" that is, as you commented - not defined by work, but defined by each of us. The chance to explore life with a bit of a new look. The chance to make and meet friends outside of the work environment. The chance to figure out what I REALLY like. Hmmm.
ReplyDeleteNow, I am honest when I say that I can not imagine what it is like to walk in your shoes right now, and my heart goes out to you with the struggles that you are describing. But I will also share with you that I want to believe that as you go down this difficult road your journey will have moments of joy and discovery that delights you – and I look forward to reading about it all.
Hugs to you, and I am very glad you are blogging!
I found you through Time Goes By, as well. What a challenge you face! I work but (tick, tick, tick....)I am thinking in the back of my mind all the time that I must gather information and inspiration for alternatives because "There but for the grace of God go I." It could happen to me anytime. I keep thinking about what work gives me (beyond income)in structure and focus in my life and wonder what I could do now to take charge of that. It is a daunting prospect. Keep talking (blogging) about it. I am very interested in what you discover on your journey!
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